Saturday, October 08, 2011

Finding Sustainability

 I've been delaying writing this piece because I'm still digesting the series of events that led us to this point. So, here I am facing the music...even if it pains me still. I won't go into details but will just state what I need to in order for my blog to have some linear truth.

In exactly 7 days, Santi and I will be flying back home to join my husband in the urban jungle I've known my whole life...Manila. (GASP)

Hello again, Metro Manila.
 Yes, we've come to realize that our dreams of living in this paradise should be put on hold for the moment. WHY? Because we found ourselves not being sustainable in a sustainable place. Does that make sense?
I'm going to miss these looking out to these trees
 More than a year ago, in February of 2010, my family and I had the guts to move to Palawan to live our dream.



I wrote about the big leap here. We had concrete PLANS, of course. Well, at least we thought they were fool-proof enough. Until _____ hits the fan. And we felt like poor pawns in a chessboard, running out of moves.

Endless thoughts sound like this... Was it an immature and impulsive move? Did we play our cards wrong? My husband and I can go on and on and on...and we'd still be at the same point right now.

But I do believe that things happen for a reason. And slowly, I am trying to trust the greater scheme of things the universe has planned for my family. Maybe one day, we'll be back to fulfill the dream...a sustainable one :)

Family photo taken at the time of our farm land acquisition circa Dec 2010
An Open Letter to My Son
Santi plays with a next door neighbor under a Mango Tree
 My dear little Santiago,
A few days ago it broke my heart to hear you say that you didn't want to go back to Manila, that you wanted to live in the farm and spend Christmas here with Mommy and Daddy. At the moment, there are things that we cannot explain to you but one day you will understand why we left your favorite place, this farm which you have learned to love and call home. Remember that home is not just a place, but a feeling in your heart when you are complete. I promise that we will be back someday.


Love Always,
Mommy (& Daddy!)


I still believe in paradise. But now at least I know it's not some place you can look for, 'cause it's not where you go. It's how you feel for a moment in your life when you're a part of something, and if you find that moment... it lasts forever...

5 comments:

noelle said...

tear :(

but yes i also believe there's always a reason for things that happen to us. as you can see now so many good opportunities are already manifesting to you now :) happy to have you back in manila tho! haha!

see you in a few!

Mariel Ferrer said...

Hi Monica!
Why are you moving back to Manila? it's always been my dream to move to Palawan. My boyfriend is a dive instructor and we are dreaming of moving there. Right now I am finalizing my homebased job and i hope it finalizes soon. anyway, good luck in your new urban adventure! Kudos to your courage! and good luck!

Mariel Ferrer said...

Hi Monica!
Why are you moving back to Manila? it's always been my dream to move to Palawan. My boyfriend is a dive instructor and we are dreaming of moving there. Right now I am finalizing my homebased job and i hope it finalizes soon. anyway, good luck in your new urban adventure! Kudos to your courage! and good luck!

Mom New Here said...

You've already done so much here in Palawan, in so little time. And I am just talking about the lessons you've shared, the positive energy that you give off and the little bits of advice you willingly give away.

Because of you, I've bought my own yoga mat now which I use almost everyday. I've also shifted to a fresh fruit breakfast and I feel much better...without knowing that I could feel better! Been reading up further. Thank you for jumpstarting my journey into wellness!

Maybe more people in Manila need you there. :)

But I am sure you'll be back someday.

Take care! See you around!

Rone Valles Guerrero said...

Things definitely happen for a reason. Enjoy this new adventure in the concrete jungle.

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